Is it just me or does everyone feel like running away to join the circus? Figuratively speaking of course.
The confines of life get to me sometimes, as I’m sure it does you. I feel like a caged wild animal. Maybe referring to me as a wild animal is going too far, I’d say I was more like a caged dolphin – you know your duty is to perform predictable tricks but you can see the ocean beyond and dream of one day exploring what that ocean holds for you.
What holds me back is what I believe is the right thing to do, the right way to live, the right way to work and the right way to give myself to those closest to me. However, never too far away, packed in a slightly ajar closet, are the thoughts of what I’d love to do and that is: “Run Katie, Run!
Where am I going to run too, you ask?
This is a good question but, wherever it is – probably near the beach, I see myself dressed like a hippy, pottering around a garden, with a paint and easel not too far away. Yes I know I can’t paint, but this is my imagination and I can do anything in it.
In my imaginary world I don’t work 5 days a week, nor do I live in a penthouse apartment, nor can I buy more than I need or want. All I need and want is to have loving people around me and live for today, not for retirement.
[Harp music here, reality returning……]
Well, that was a nice little day dream, now back to the real world where I’m up at 6.27am writing about what I’d really want to do today albeit dressed as a hippy.
So what will I really be doing?
At 7am I’ll start getting ready for work. At 8am I’ll commence my drive to work where it may take 40-60 minutes to get 14 klms. Then I’ll sit at my desk most of the day, surface for lunch around 12 noon, coffee at 3pm, leave for home around 5.30pm, get home, have dinner, watch TV, maybe work on kitykate.com, then go to bed around 11pm, wake up tomorrow at 5ish to start all over again. Until Saturday, the day I get to put my toe in the ocean of life.
OMG is this it? Is this really what life is about? Shoot me now!
Ok, I realise that last statement is a bit overly dramatic but while I’m writing this blog that little closet has opened just a little bit more. Will I get the nerve to run and be free from the confines of life?
All I have to say about that is: Watch this space, you just never know!